Sleep Chronicles Day 2

Snafu Day 2

Day two was much less of a snafu, so maybe we are making progress?   I was worried in the beginning of the night because I was going to be by myself (daddy had a meeting) and I have PMS(partial hysterectomy so yes I still have PMS) so I am just plain bitchy and need to be where people are not.

Raising children really IS like being pecked to death by chickens and when you need some space, the only thing you can count on is not getting it.  Bad mood in full swing, I am thinking how the hell can we expect to get them back on schedule if our schedule is different all the time?  Meetings, late dinners, grocery store visits, prescription pick ups, etc.  While in the throws of being mad at the world and uncomfortable in my own skin I realized something very important.  A household full of people (no matter who you are) is a powder keg of schedules and activity that can BLOW at any given moment causing a snafu.  My point is that there will always be something tossed into the mix to screw things up, thus making retaining a schedule even more important.  K, stop the pre panic and get on with the program!  Daddy had to leave around 7ish for a meeting, this is bad because I don’t want to lose my wing man and it’s yet another change when we are trying to regain a schedule but actually good for attempting bedtime.  When you do not have the two parent dichotomy, things go much more smoothly.  Not sure why this is but this beggar ain't about to be a chooser.   The twins were EXHAUSTED from their actions on night # 1 so that should help and the boy child had some what of a toxic melt down just prior to bed so he successfully wore himself out.

Game on

Daddy gave me the much needed time I was bitching about not having earlier by taking the twins up to get ready for bed while I cleaned the downstairs.  It is amazing how after a meal, the hard wood and rug under the dinner table look like the floor of a circus tent.  Hans Christian Andersen must have lived with twins because he was onto something with The Princess and the pea! One little pea can mess up A LOT and when you get a bevy of them on the floor you have a crash liability.   I have literally thrown my back out by slipping on ONE of those little suckers!  I swear I should lobby Insurance Companies to start allowing us to cover our homes with collision and liability insurance.  Anyway, I digress.

I finished clean up and arrived upstairs to a screaming boy.  It seems he had “acted up” and disrupted book time so daddy excommunicated him from the reading.  Pissed off and tear ridden, he went into their room to find all their “friends” and books had been removed.  He asked me, “WHHHHHYYY” and he sounded much like Nettie from the Color Purple.  Pitiful just pitiful but I just looked at him and said, “I think you know why.”  He screamed and cried and told me how unfair it was of us.  He even threw in a “well if you loved us, you WOULD NEVER take our BOOKS.”  Even I had to give him an A for effort on that one…way to go dude, notice, point out and crucify me for taking the educational material but don’t even think of mentioning the missing Scooby Doo crew and Mystery Machine.  Yep, I am common as dog shit for taking the books. I thought to myself because thoughts are free, I too am tired so do I feel a trace of sorry or guilt over it?  Nope, Nada, zilch!  You two will sleep tonight if I have to make this damn bedroom look as stark and institutional as a bedroom in a homeless shelter!  “Hey don’t we have cots out in the garage…boy that would really make an impact!  OK now I AM being evil.  I don’t want to disturb them into years of therapy, I am sure that will come when they are teenagers, right now I just get them back into good sleeping habits.  I sat down in the chair for a few minutes because he was crying about not being able have a book read to him.  I explained that he was removed from the book reading because he was being disruptive so why should he get to come in here and be read a book?  He didn’t like it but he understood and came to sit in my lap and get some hugs and kisses.  “Will you at least give me some love love mommy, is that ok?”  OK, now he is really pushing that knife in DEEP.  We snuggle in the chair until his sister enters the room. 

She comes in with her daddy and is ready for bed about 15 minutes later and daddy exits to go to his meeting.  I give them each a few books and 10 minutes to read with the light on.  Ten minutes later I come back up to turn out the light, take the books and administer last hugs and kisses for the night.  I get downstairs and they begin to chatter.  I also hear them (well her) sneaking again into other regions of the house looking for all the toys that had been removed.  THIS is where it’s hard for me to not go up and bust them cold and make them get back into bed.  I also hear that it is just her so I know it won’t be long before she settles because without her partner is crime she won’t hang on for long.  I turn the TV louder and keep my seat.  Mantra:  It doesn’t matter where in the house they fall asleep, as long as they fall asleep.  House is a safe zone, house is a safe zone, just let it be mommy you can’t control everything!  I repeat this over and over and over until my daughter is standing right in front of my face.  She says in a very angry voice, “I WANT TO GO SLEEP IN THE GUEST BEDROOM!”   I ignore her until she pushed the computer closed and repeats it AGAIN but louder.  I want to laugh but instead I look at her and shake my head no and point to the stairs.  She is steaming mad and I can see it.  I think she wanted to spit green pea soup at me.  Her reaction was probably one that I would have done and probably did do a few times.  She rolled her eyes, shook her 4 year old head and grabbed HER Hello Kitty blanket that I was comfortably wrapped up in.  Damn that is one warm blanket!  She wrapped it around her neck, (with a little help from me so she wouldn’t fall) she snubbed her nose at me as if to say, screw you bitch the blanket is MINE!  She turned on her heels and headed for the steps and disappeared around the corner.

Approximately 30 minutes later I went upstairs to make sure they were not asleep on top of the dresser or hanging from any light fixtures.  They were once again sound asleep in their own beds.  Hell to the yeah this one is a full on victory!  He was on his side, breathing quietly with all his friends, looked as though he had not moved since I gave him the military tuck in.  She was buck naked, face down with one arm and one leg hanging off the bed like a drunk that had wandered in and crashed!  With her right hand, she was gripping one of her stuffed animals by the neck, HARD.  The Hello Kitty blanket she lifted from me was on the floor just inside the door.  I laughed SO hard then I re-dressed her and covered her up with her comforter, gave them both kisses and left the room.  I stopped at the door and picked up the Hello Kitty blanket and took that sucker back downstairs with me!  It is one warm damn blanket.  Sometimes mommy’s DO get the last word!